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Thursday, August 11, 2011
8:01 PM | Posted by Maureen | | Edit Post
I was chatting with my sister a few weeks ago about the
epidemic of pessimism that seems to exist in my family.
Yes, I’m a closet pessimist. I fight it, but it’s deeply
embedded in my DNA. Probably why I take the opposite tack as much as possible.
I mean, it’s exhausting! And I have better things to do than focus on the great
whack-a-mole bat poised above me all the time.
But I know it’s there.
Yup. You know that one. It’s more subtle than the inner
critics. ICs are easier to deal with. Toss them to the Kraken and keep my hands
on the wheel.
But the bat…that’s more like the wind and there is no
telling how it will blow.
Or to use the whack-a-mole metaphor, when that bat will
smack down on you…the moment you think… “Oh! Sunshine! I want to feel sunshine
on my nose and whiskers…” And you carefully pop up to sample the sweet
weather…and the bat hits. Like lightening, suddenly, your whiskers are bent,
your nose hurts and you’re dizzy.
(Mixing a lot of metaphors today, ain’t I?)
My sis and I were going back and forth about how hard it is
to relax and enjoy good fortune… In my family, and I’m sure, for a lot of
people, we tend to look sideways at good fortune. Wondering where the stick
is…nothing good happens without a ‘trick’ involved. That sort of thinking. And
when you have a run of good luck, you tend to hold it close, for fear that if
you crow about it you’ll attract the attention of the gods, who will smack you for
I have no idea where this mindset came from. My parents
didn’t use the old bait and trick crap. No trickery of any sort. But maybe a
touch of fatalism? Just not sure, really.
(I do think it may just be part of the Irish psyche.)
But let’s face it, right now I think all of America is
running scared with this sort of thinking. The economic recovery, however you
look at it, leaves us all looking over our shoulder…waiting for that bat to
come out and smack us if we peek out of our safe little holes.
Though living in a hole really isn’t all that safe, or
scenic, or life affirming. Wow, it is hard to look beyond it.
I’m published, but keep waiting for the bat. I look at my
slow sales and feel that this is the bat, right there. Should have never let
myself feel good…see? That’s what comes of thinking things were looking up.
Yeah, that’s me, slapping myself. I really hate feeling this
way and know it does no good…in fact, it can attract more bad luck! Ha! There I
go again! I can spin good luck into a magnet for bad luck and I can spin bad
luck as a way to attract more bad luck!
It’s a gift.
Or is that a curse?
How do you feel about
this metaphor? Are you the bat, always missing the moles, who laugh at you? Or
are you the mole, peering into the sky, knowing that bat is out there?
Labels: Loader's Logic (2nd Chance)